3 Items To Get You Through Tomorrow

"Thanks for that!" -Future You.

1. Caravanaway!

Are you tired of not knowing what’s real and fake? Having to talk to those wappies all the time? Giving a shit? With this caravan you’ll never have to worry about dealing with peaople again! Pull down the ‘forest drapes’, turn on the soothing ‘forest’ CD and get away from it all (with automatic restocked fridge). Play chess solitarily, read a dictonary, listen to Mozart, those things wont lie to you!

It’s the only way to keep ignorant and happy! Trust us. Caravanaway has fun, non negotional activities and is STACKABLE!! Up to 40 Caravanaways! Buy now, before they ar sold out! Rent for 4.600,- a month.

2 people are looking at this product right now.

Testimonial: “Wow. I used to have to talk to my family and friends and hear all their stupid beliefs. I had to read the newspaper and watch the news and just get a headache while having to wonder what was true. Now I don’t have to think at all!”
-God

Editor: Sarah

2. NEWSFLIX

Are you tired of menecing reality? Scanning though endless newssites for the truth? NEWSFLIX does this for you: With NEWSFLIX you can choose your alignment in the POLITICAL COMPASS and our tested algorithm will filter from the web news and boradcats that match your predetermined bias!

Buy NOW for only 59.99$/month! Only 500 spots available!

Testimonial: “Hi, I’m Mark, a real people! Before subscribing to NEWSFLIX I wasn’t sure or was lsitening on the readio or on the news. I was spending all my time on twitter arguing with Liberals! But now thanks to NEWSFLIX, I always know I’m RIGHT! No more arguing, no more uncertanty. Trust your feelings, trust NEWSFLIX!”
-Mark

Editor: Micheal C.

3. Keep-sakEs FROM a TimE lonG LosTT!

Are you sick of not having physical evidence of the past?! Many things have gone extinct becasue there was an easier option, but that gives us a lack of physical, touchable, re-livable memorabilia.

Comes with unique Visisble Usage Indicators (VUI). Every unit is different, pick your favortie NOW for just 4,321 ETH.

Testimonial: “OWNMAI GOWD! Ever since I bought a Netherlands to Jamaica pstal stamp I’ve been having very romantic visual views and reproductions of Jamaica!”
-Mary Mac

Editor: Yannick B.